Navigating Separation, Divorce and Blended Families
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Blending Families Together: Stepparenting By Choice

Blending Families Together: Stepparenting By Choice | Navigating Separation, Divorce and Blended Families | Scoop.it
Stepparenting children in blended families can be challenging. Dr. Ann-Louise Lockhart offers tips on navigating the dynamics.
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How to Talk to Your Kids about Divorce

How to Talk to Your Kids about Divorce | Navigating Separation, Divorce and Blended Families | Scoop.it

Going through a separation or divorce can be a painful and confusing time for many. Here is some advice on how to have the difficult initial conversation with your kids.

Fuller Life Family Therapy's insight:

Going through a separation or divorce can be a painful and confusing time for many. Here is some advice on how to have the difficult initial conversation with your kids.

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9 Ways to Let Go of Obsessions

9 Ways to Let Go of Obsessions | Navigating Separation, Divorce and Blended Families | Scoop.it
Obsessions … the brick walls that form a prison around your mind. The harder you try to get rid of them, the more powerful they become.
Fuller Life Family Therapy's insight:

The first thing you want to do when you get an intrusive thought is to respond with logic.

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Blending Families - 5 Tips For Successful Step-Parenting

Blending Families - 5 Tips For Successful Step-Parenting | Navigating Separation, Divorce and Blended Families | Scoop.it
Are you remarrying after divorce? Consider our tips for blending families.
Fuller Life Family Therapy's insight:

Blending families together can be complicated and unnerving . Learn how to do so with love and ease. 

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On the Other Side of Burnout |

On the Other Side of Burnout | | Navigating Separation, Divorce and Blended Families | Scoop.it
We may find ourselves feeling overwhelmed and fatigued by the multiple demands of our lives. How can we prevent or heal from burnout that seems unavoidable.
Fuller Life Family Therapy's insight:

We may find ourselves feeling overwhelmed and fatigued by the multiple demands of our lives. How can we prevent or heal from burnout that seems unavoidable.

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Successful Co-parenting Video by Children of Divorce

Successful Co-parenting Video by Children of Divorce | Navigating Separation, Divorce and Blended Families | Scoop.it
Successful co-parenting can indeed be found by listening to children of divorce. The effects of divorce on children and learning how to cope with divorce.
Fuller Life Family Therapy's insight:

Video with messages from kids to their co-parenting parents. 

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The Secret To Blending A Family | Alphamom

The Secret To Blending A Family | Alphamom | Navigating Separation, Divorce and Blended Families | Scoop.it
The secret to successfully blending a family is making peace with it being messy and ongoing and scary and wonderful.

Via Brenda Elliott, Dr. Amy Fuller
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being a parent post-divorce | divorce and family mediation in nyc

being a parent post-divorce | divorce and family mediation in nyc | Navigating Separation, Divorce and Blended Families | Scoop.it

being a parent post-divorce


Cooperating with your ex for the sake of your children can seem overwhelming in the early stages of the divorce. Try to put aside your relationship issues, your hurt and your anger towards one another and put your children’s needs first. Your marriage may be over but your family is not and your children need to know and feel that you will both continue to love them and be there for them despite the break up.


Via Dr. Amy Fuller
Dr. Amy Fuller's curator insight, August 22, 2013 12:08 AM

Knowing how to coparent after a divorce is a very difficult to navigate...here are some tips for beginning from a family mediator

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The Divorced Kids' Manifesto - Kate Scharff, LCSW-C LICSW

The Divorced Kids' Manifesto - Kate Scharff, LCSW-C LICSW | Navigating Separation, Divorce and Blended Families | Scoop.it
  • Don’t criticize each other in front of us. Rolling your eyes counts. After a few years we might stop telling you how much we hate it. We never stop hating it. And by the way– we overhear about ninety-five percent of your phone conversations.
  •  If we tell you something bad that happened at the other parent’s house, just listen. Maybe try to be supportive or help us figure out how to cope. We hate it when you have a conniption and run to the phone. Plus, we can tell when you’re secretly psyched that it’s not all paradise “over there.” That sucks, too.

Via Dr. Amy Fuller
Dr. Amy Fuller's curator insight, August 22, 2013 12:01 AM

This is excellent manifesto for parents to know what divorce is like for kids. 

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Survey Reveals #1 Reason Couples Divorce

Survey Reveals #1 Reason Couples Divorce | Navigating Separation, Divorce and Blended Families | Scoop.it
A new survey confirms what your premarital counselor knew all along: the trick to staving off divorce lies in how effectively you and your spouse communicate.

Via Dr. Amy Fuller
Maria Teresa Frezet terapeuta olistica's curator insight, December 2, 2013 12:53 PM

Communication!!!! First of all communication MUST be inside ourselves, with our inner self! The "outside" is simply the reflection of the inside! 

You change the inside.... thw world around you is going to change!!!

 

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My Divorce Library - My Dad's Divorce Blog - Reading and Reference Library | The Off Parent

My Divorce Library - My Dad's Divorce Blog - Reading and Reference Library | The Off Parent | Navigating Separation, Divorce and Blended Families | Scoop.it
The books of my divorce. I hope these can help you as much as they helped me. The books that got me through my divorce in one piece.
Fuller Life Family Therapy's insight:

We cannot endorse all of these books on this reading list, but many of them are excellent resources. 

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The Structured Separation Agreement – Patrick Ward, PhD

Occasionally in my practice there is a couple I am working with that are “stuck” and if they continue to stay together they will definitely hurt their chances of perpetual marital bliss. Yet, divorce is not something I encourage though for some it becomes a decision they must make.  Sometimes it is helpful for the couple to agree to “trial separation.”  In this post you will learn a way to go about a structured or trial separation. 

Fuller Life Family Therapy's insight:

List of questions for couples moving toward separation...

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Children and Divorce: Helping your kids cope with the effects of separation and divorce

Children and Divorce: Helping your kids cope with the effects of separation and divorce | Navigating Separation, Divorce and Blended Families | Scoop.it
Divorce is tough on kids. Here’s what you can do to help them cope.
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Children's Bill of Rights

Every child whose parents divorce has:

 

  1. The right to love and be loved by both of your parents without feeling guilt or disapproval.
  2. The right to be protected from your parents’ anger with each other.
  3. The right to be kept out of the middle of your parents’ conflict, including the right not to pick sides, carry messages, or hear complaints about the other parent.
  4. The right not to have to choose one of your parents over the other.
  5. The right not to have to be responsible for the burden of either of your parents’ emotional problems.
  6. The right to know well in advance about important changes that will affect your life; for example, when one of your parents is going to move or get remarried.
  7. The right to reasonable financial support during your childhood and through your college years.
  8. The right to have feelings, to express your feelings, and to have both parents listen to how you feel.
  9. The right to have a life that is as close as possible to what it would have been if your parents stayed together.
  10. The right to be a kid.

o edit the content

Fuller Life Family Therapy's insight:

Divorced parents still must fulfill their responsibilities to their kids...

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Co-Parenting Tips for Divorced Parents: Making Joint Custody Work After a Divorce or Separation

Co-Parenting Tips for Divorced Parents: Making Joint Custody Work After a Divorce or Separation | Navigating Separation, Divorce and Blended Families | Scoop.it
Co-parenting is rarely easy, but with these tips you can remain calm, stay consistent, and avoid conflict with your ex to make joint custody work.
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Four Truths about Stepfamilies that You Need to Know - Fuller Life Family Therapy Institute

Four Truths about Stepfamilies that You Need to Know - Fuller Life Family Therapy Institute | Navigating Separation, Divorce and Blended Families | Scoop.it
Stepfamilies are, and have been, on the rise. Here are some important truths to consider when blending families.
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Stepfamily Living ~ Elizabeth Einstein

Stepfamily Living ~ Elizabeth Einstein | Navigating Separation, Divorce and Blended Families | Scoop.it
Stepfamily and remarriage resources and tips. Quality, award-winning books, bookets and educational materials addressing all aspects of successful blended family life from one of America's leaders in the stepfamily world.
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DivorceCare for Kids divorce recovery support groups for children

DivorceCare for Kids divorce recovery support groups for children | Navigating Separation, Divorce and Blended Families | Scoop.it
DivorceCare for Kids is a divorce recovery support group to help your children, 5-12 years of age, heal from the pain caused by a separation or divorce.
Fuller Life Family Therapy's insight:

Great website with information about divorce with resources for families and also support group information for children.

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Honoring the Remarried Family « Family Focused Solutions

Honoring the Remarried Family « Family Focused Solutions | Navigating Separation, Divorce and Blended Families | Scoop.it

There is a distinct lack of adequate language to describe the new relationships that arise in a “remarried” family. The complexities of relationships in remarried binuclear post-divorce families defy simple charting or characterization. The need to develop both more open and more clearly defined relationship boundaries in the expanded family that is created when a former spouse remarries is complicated by this lack of simple relational terms. Additions and subtractions of members in three generations simultaneously, structural and functional changes in rules and roles, and the clash of pre-existing family cultures, create loyalty conflicts around “who’s the boss”?

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Handouts for Divorcing Parents

Handouts for Divorcing Parents | Navigating Separation, Divorce and Blended Families | Scoop.it

Lots of informative handouts with suggetions for best practice when parents divorce. 

Telling the Children

Reassuring the Children

Dealing with Children's Feelings of Fault

Talking about Fault

Whom Do You Tell?

Schedule: General Guidelines

Planning a Schedule

Handovers

Short Visits

Staying in Touch

An Agreement Children Can Read


Via Dr. Amy Fuller
Fuller Life Family Therapy's insight:

Excellent resource for parents

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Top Ten Divorce Don'ts

Top Ten Divorce Don'ts | Navigating Separation, Divorce and Blended Families | Scoop.it
Top ten divorce don'ts from renowned marriage expert, Gary Neuman.

Via Dr. Amy Fuller
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Bowen Family Systems Coaching for the Post-Divorce Couples

Bowen Family Systems Coaching for the Post-Divorce Couples | Navigating Separation, Divorce and Blended Families | Scoop.it

At some point, for a significant minority of couples, one or both partners conclude that the strategies of acceptance and change no longer work. At that juncture, the goal of living a healthier, happier, more productive life shifts from working to resolve marital difficulties to focusing on a Good Divorce. But how do you make it work if your former spouse doesn’t want to make it work? How do you make it better for your children and yourself? What are the rules of engagement when former partners are no longer intimate or romantic but remain co-parents for life? How does the Family Forest analogy apply post-divorce with an even more complicated range of ambiguities, acrimony and cooperation?


Via Dr. Amy Fuller
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Tips for Divorced Parents: Co-parenting with Your Ex and Making Joint Custody Work

Tips for Divorced Parents: Co-parenting with Your Ex and Making Joint Custody Work | Navigating Separation, Divorce and Blended Families | Scoop.it

Co-parenting amicably with your ex can give your children stability and close relationships with both parents–but it's rarely easy. Putting aside relationship issues to co-parent agreeably can be fraught with stress. Despite the many challenges, though, it is possible to develop a cordial working relationship with your ex for the sake of your children. With these tips, you can remain calm, stay consistent, and avoid or resolve conflict with your ex and make joint custody work.

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A HEALING SEPARATION With Goals

http://marriagemissions.com/healing-separation/

A Healing Separation is a structured time apart in which can help a couple heal a relationship that isn’t working. It can also help revitalize and renew a relationship that’s working. The Healing Separation is designed to transform the basis of a love relationship —moving it from neediness to health. A successful Healing Separation requires that both partners be committed to personal growth, and to creating healthier relationships with themselves and each other. Such a framework will allow them to carve out a new and more fulfilling relationship than they’ve known in the past.

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Marriage Done Right: The foundation of success for stepfamilies

We all have priorities, but then we get sidetracked into matters that seem important at the time and in the process ignore what's important. In marriage the real priority is the marriage. No other relationships and no other issues are more important. Still, it's easy to get distracted.

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